When the Internet Shuts Down, We Will Definitely All Die
Recent study suggests if you don’t know what Kylie Jenner has had for breakfast there’s a 99.9% chance you will forget how to breathe. Your phones, your tablets, your iPads, your mp3 players, your smart watches, your fancy fridges from John Lewis: they all are united by one holy binding force, they all have Wi-Fi. A spiritual messenger that guides you with heavenly power through every half second of the day. Her knowledge is as infinite and as boundless as the universe. Don’t know whether goldfish can survive in milk or not? Is Africa a country? Need to urgently know whether your Aunt Meredith who you haven’t seen for 7 years got a refund on her hairdryer she got from amazon last week? The internet has you covered. As our solar system orbits around the sun, we orbit around our love of telling the interwoven virtual sphere about the precise length of toilet paper we prefer to use down to the nearest millimetre and if we scrunch that said toi...